Revolt Towards

I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For...

I went to see U2 last night and it was really amazing. They are amazing performers. They broke Pope John Paul's record for how many people ever came to the Giants Stadium (and he politely apologized to His Holiness). They sang many songs, including "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For". If you don't know (and you'd be crazy for not knowing this song), the last stanza goes like this:

You broke the bonds
And you loosed the chains
Carried the cross
Of my shame
Of my shame
You know I believe it

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

The way Bono paused when you sang "You know.....I believe it" let me know he still truly did believe it. It let me know he still knew what he's known for a long while, about a man named Jesus.

But the song also brings me to a place of diving discontent where I know I still haven't found what I'm looking for. "Maybe I never will?" I think. But it's not enough for me to know Jesus died for me if I can't still see Him moving in my life and in the world around me.

I was walking up Union just now back to the Tea Lounge wondering, "Is Jesus' enough for this city? Is Jesus is enough for that man walking his dog? Is he enough for that little latino baby being pushed in the stroller by his mom? Is He enough for the people sitting around me as I type this?"

Questions like this always come back to me (and you too, as you read this). Jesus has to be enough for me and I know he is. But if I contain that just to me, then like I said a few days ago on another blog, I'm missing something inherent to the Gospel of the Kingdom if it's just about me.

I know I believe, somewhere in my core, He is enough for this entire city. I was reading on the subway in the gospel of Matthew that records Jesus saying that the "publicans and the harlots" will be the first to enter the Kingdom (KJV) and God knows even I have felt like the whore at His feet and sometimes begging to have that proximity she did.

It comes down to me, but with the acknowledgement that I need something greater than me. I need His power. I want His power. The world doesn't know it, but it wants it too. I know I can't save this city or any city. But the Spirit of God moving on a humbled heart and life—now that's powerful. Unyielded. Unrestrained. Uncontainable. 

The world needs His power. I, for Christ's sake, need His power. 

Sign. Wonder. Miracle. 

The tangible power of Jesus changed Jerusalem and the surrounding cities. And It can change this city and the cities back home.

First Day in NYC (and Hosting the Presence)

I'm in NYC. 

So far, so good. Catching up with Nate. Meeting his roommates. Being hot and sweaty as it's 80 degrees here and a chance of rain. I came here to see U2 tonight. But I know there is more that this short stint in the Big Apple has for me. I'm at a café right in Park Slope in Brooklyn right now called the Tea Lounge taking in all the people. People reading, eating, doing their online updates, email checks and Facebooking. Business types. Classy types. Straight types. Gay types. Busy types. Bored types. And then there is me in the midst of it all excited to be somewhere new and yet excited (even before I got to LAX) to be back home already because I know He's up to something with my time here.

So we'll see what that something is overtime while I'm here. I'm excited for worship on Tuesday and that excitement gets deeper as I walk down Union Street surround by the chilling presence of God while listening to a song that sings "I will hold nothing back from you". Its amazing where He can be found if we just pay attention to the wind and to the whisper.

I pray you, whoever you are reading this and wherever you are reading this, find yourself as a host of the Presence today. Maybe, as you read this, you don't even know what I mean by that, but all that means is encountering what the First Nations people called the Great Spirit that surrounds us all and the same Spirit who Genesis says was "hovering over the waters" since the beginning (Gen 1:2) and Jesus himself said we must be born of the Spirit (John 3), just like the wind comes and goes with no explanation so it is with God's Spirit.

Invite the Presence. Encounter the Presence. Host the Presence. In all your deeds. In all your comings and goings. He's waiting to be encountered!

Call It Going Green or Going Blue...It's Still Short of the Kingdom.

My good friend Joey Briglio over at TheBlessedNaturalist.com just posted a blog about the next push in the environmental movement to go BLUE. There are three objectives of the BLUE movement. "First, to measurably improve the quality of life of the people who join. Second, to engage as many people as possible in the effort. And third, to increase their effectiveness in making a difference in their community and the world."

The interesting this is that I was at the Earth Day Fest a year and a half ago in Ojai when the LEEDS guy brought up that "the next thing is BLUE". So what does it mean and how do we use it? I laughed when I read the BLUE article that said:

How do I use it in a sentence?

"I'm totally into the environment," she says as she updates her status on Facebook, "but I'm the type of person who's BLUE and not only green."
 

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As I was laughing at this statement and commenting on Joey's blog the other day, it hit me—I wonder if the coming push to BLUE is humanity's take on the Gospel of the Kingdom. Because as some of you might know or have figured out, I've struggled with Green from the get-go, not as a bad idea, but an incomplete one. Blue is way closer to solving the frustration in my heart about Green. At least Blue has goals and a concentrated push of the three values behind it. 

But as I was saying—maybe, just maybe, the real answer we all need, even the Church (because God knows they don't get it at all) is the Gospel of the Kingdom that encompasses Green, Blue, and every other spectrum of the rainbow with the promise from God himself that He will not destroy the earth again. Unfortunately, that doesn't mean we ourselves are free from destroying it. For better or worse, He has entrusted it to us to care for it because "the earth is the Lord's and everything it"—man, woman, animal, plant, land, water, sky.

I truly love that our faith and our God is mindful of all these things. He's mindful to the concerns of the planet that is groaning and the sparrows and the blades of grass, as much as He is mindful to the my own yearnings, cries and desires in my own life. And then on top of it, the renovation He does in my heart to pursue His heart makes me love the things He loves which is the groaning planet, the sparrows and the blades of grass and my brothers and sisters around the world with their own yearnings, cries and desires. It's a cyclical faith that we live where the outflow of our relationship with Him spills out ONTO and INTO the world around us.

If the cyclical reality of our faith—our hearts to His heart and back to our heart for 'all creation'—is not happening in our lives, then we are missing some integral points to the whole Gospel itself.

Quote of the Week (9.8.09)

Resolve: Generously and with no half-hearted, timorous dread of the opinions of Church and men to manifest my mission ... You have no time to occupy your thoughts with that complacency or consideration of what others will think. Your business is simply, “What will my Father in heaven think?”
 - St. Katherine Drexel, founder of the Sisters of the Blessed Sacrament

Catalysts

The other day I was driving to Pasadena and thinking through my life and all the things that I do versus all the things I don't do. Something of the things I do are design print and web media for clients around Southern California, drive to the LA region at least twice a week and lately I have been doing worship at least once a week. And up until last week, my Thursdays were spent leading Theology On Tap at Garman's Pub. But here is a list of some of the things I don't do or wish I was doing: writing more songs; actively pursuing more of my ideas; working on my book and actually, dare I say, attempt to write a chapter; write the business plan for Jumla, the coffee/communi/tea house I want to open one day; and last, but surely not least, work on a new idea I have to get musicians putting out music in vinyl and downloadable formats with a portion of the proceeds going to non-profit organizations.

So that leads me to the question:
What made me step up to the plate and keep on designing for clients, answering phone calls and going to new meetings about new projects, but neglecting my other passions?

The answer? I had a catalyst.

Just a few minutes ago I received a call from a potential client, who saw an existing site and wants to know what it would cost for something similar. I will return the phone, give them an estimate, probably meet with them and then after the estimate is hopefully approved, I will get my first down-payment to begin their project. This will inadvertently mean my bills can be paid, I have gas and I can eat.

But I want to stress, money is not the only catalyst in this mix. It is also the simple fact that this is a business. There is a professional I must uphold and keep. In that mix, there is also having pride in the business and the experience I provide, even if that means I end up not working with the potential client. All of these things are catalysts that keep me accountable and yet, unfortunately, doing things I need to do and not doing the things I really, really want to do.
 

Creating the Catalysts

All of life is but a series of colliding catalysts. A poet lives their day experiencing life and it is these experiences that provide the words and language to convey what is in the poet's heart. Two people find themselves in a city, bumping into each other on accident while at a café and the next thing you know, they are getting dinner together and then, many months later, planning their marriage and a life full of children.

Catalysts are all around us. But there is an unfortunate reality: many of us need catalysts that don't exist yet. That is why I want to encourage you like I've encouraged myself this past week. Make daily and monthly to-do lists. Set deadlines. Arrange times of intentional collaboration with friends and like-minded people.

Imagine what would happen if we were all pursuing the ideas we've tucked away for so long in our hearts. What if they weren't tucked away anymore? What would the world look like if a group of committed friends stood by one another in accountability and friendship to go for the things they only hope to do? 

May we be those kinds of friends and family members. May we be the catalyst in our world, creating more catalysts for opportunity, creativity and dream making. The world is waiting on us!

The Way You Love Me Video!

You asked for it and here it is! The lyrics are here.

The Sloppy Wet Kiss

 

My friend Brian told me the other day that David Crowder's new album contains John Mark McMillan's 'How He Loves', but the Crowder band changed the lyrics from "Heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss" to "Heaven meets earth like an unforeseen kiss". (Watch here if you like)

While I don't want to get into theology debates on if Heaven meeting Earth is truly "unforeseen" or if our eyes and ears and minds are just closed, I do know I would be pretty bummed to have a song I wrote lyrically altered, even if it meant my song would be heard. Call it, artistic-license being violated.

But what struck me more than the lyrical changes was the dialogue by some on the YouTube comments about the lyrics and what this actually reveals about us, as the Church, and our hearts in encountering God in worship. Here is the account of what two people were discussing:

HubbaRider14: "anything that makes you open your eyes during worship shouldn't be there. its about connecting with God. and if i said sloppy wet kiss in the middle of worship, i'd be like what the heck......."

And the response to HubbaRider14 from Meeko777:
"i'm gonna have to agree, if i heard sloppy wet kiss during worship it would most likely distract me every time, (Partially because i'm a.d.d. but thats not the point) So im glad david crowder changed it to 'unforseen kiss' good call there to be honest."

Whether the lyrics suck or not, that's one thing. But the observation here of so many who feel they shouldn't open their eyes or be distracted by lyrics, music or leaders is a huge disservice to God Himself who is all about changing paradigms and making us open our eyes to Him.

I WANT to be shaken and stirred and know I am loved by Heaven's relentless pursuit. I WANT have something new that rattles me a removes me from just singing songs or memorized lyrics. I WANT to be ravished by God and how does love us, but who isn't content on having us remain where we are. But a God who gives us new lyrics and sounds and melodies and harmonies. To end here on a lyrical note from my friends in mewithoutYou:

We hunger, but though all that we eat brings us little relief 

We don't know quite what else to do, 
We have all our beliefs but we don't want our beliefs,
God of peace, we want you. 

...And the Spirit Remained

The past few weeks, I've been overwhelmed by just being in the presence of God. It's making space and making time to just be found in His presence.

A friend of mine reminded me this week too that even Jesus himself went out into the wilderness, but it was in that place of making space (which also led to testing) that He came out in the power of the Spirit to start His ministry.

I've shared this verse before from John 1:32:
Then John gave this testimony: "I saw the Spirit come down from heaven as a dove and remain on him.

What does it mean "remain on him"? Jesus lived his life on earth as Perfect Theology. When we see Jesus, we see God. So then, if Jesus remained the presence of Holy Spirit and modeled for us, is there a call for us to do the same? Should I do the same? What if our working, our playing, our relationships with family, friends and the world around us; all of it was marked by own abiding in the presence of God?

The funny thing here is that in reading over John 1, I also read over John 3 and John the Baptists' testimony of Jesus and stumbled upon John 3:27. John had just been asked by his own disciples why the one "on the other side of the Jordan" (Jesus) was baptizing and everyone was going to him. To this John responds with an interesting statement:

"A man can receive only what is given him from heaven."

All I can is 'Wow!" Everything I do—my gifting, my talents and what I do with them, my breathing and my blessings—they are given to me by heaven. I think it would be alright to say that anything new I would like to receive in my life can also only be given to me from heaven, thus requiring my remaining in the Spirit. When we see Jesus' life, all of his healings, signs and wonders all came from this place of intimacy with heaven. He lived from what the Celts called the 'thin place', where the realms of earth and spirit were so close you couldn't tell them apart.

My last reflection is on the life of Gideon. In Judges 6, he meets the Lord under a tree and Gideon is told that he and his family will be blessed and he will defeat the enemy. He makes two sacrifices to the Lord and in verse 33-34, this is what happens:

33 Then all the Midianites and the Amalekites and the people of the east came together and, crossing the Jordan, encamped in the Valley of Jezreel. 34But the Spirit of the Lord clothed Gideon with Himself and took possession of him, and he blew a trumpet, and [the clan of] Abiezer was gathered to him.

"The Spirit of the Lord clothed Gideon with Himself and took possession of him." God, cloth me with yourself and take possession of my heart, soul, mind and strength, so that every hope, dream, talent and desire aligns with heaven! May anyone who reads this take you up on such an opportunity to live from a place of abiding in the vine and Remaining in the Presence. It's the only way we can live in times like these. It's the only way we will see our lives and the lives of our families, cities, states and nations changed. 

Make me hungry for you Lord; the kind of hunger I can't ignore. I know I've tasted, God, but my heart is wanting more. To know you and love you as my King; to pour our my life from this alabaster jar and kiss your feet.

Lessons from La Mancha

I was watching this other day and was moved by how good the lyrics are and something we could all glean from as we pursue a life bringing justice and love to the world around us.

It is the mission of each true knight... 

His duty... nay, his privilege!

To dream the impossible dream,
To fight the unbeatable foe,
To bear with unbearable sorrow
To run where the brave dare not go;
To right the unrightable wrong.

To love, pure and chaste, from afar,
To try, when your arms are too weary,
To reach the unreachable star!

This is my Quest to follow that star,
No matter how hopeless, no matter how far,
To fight for the right
Without question or pause,
To be willing to march into hell
For a heavenly cause!

And I know, if I'll only be true
To this glorious Quest,
That my heart will lie peaceful and calm
When I'm laid to my rest.

And the world will be better for this,
That one man, scorned and covered with scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage,
To reach the unreachable stars!

Believing For the Impossible

“That’s the way it’s done,” the Queen said with great decision: “nobody can do two things at once, you know. Let’s consider your age to begin with – how old are you?”

“I’m seven and a half exactly.”

“You needn’t say ‘exactually’,” the Queen remarked. “I can believe it without that. Now I’ll give you something to believe. I’m just one hundred and one, five months and a day.”

“I can’t believe that!” said Alice

“Can’t you?” the Queen said in a pitying tone. “Try again: draw a long breath and shut your eyes.”

Alice laughed. “There’s no use trying,” she said: “one can’t believe impossible things.”

“I daresay you haven’t had much practice,” said the Queen. “When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast…”

[Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll]

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When was the last time you believed in the impossible? Genesis 15 recounts the story of God sharing with Abram (before he was Abraham) that his ancestors would be as numerous as the stars in the night sky. God notices Abram's response and it says in verse six, "Abram believed the LORD, and he credited it to him as righteousness."

An aspect of righteousness (and being made righteous) is found in the faith to believe in the impossible, and in the faith we put in the God of the impossible. Do we trust God enough with what He reveals to us that we could see impossible things become possible? That we could see diseases be cured, the dead raised, cancer healed or believe extreme poverty could be wiped out in our lifetime? Maybe its a more simple dream like becoming an amazing parent despite the odds of your upbringing, or as in the case of my friend needing healing, maybe its the dream to do all that God has put in your heart despite living with a failing body organ...or in the case of another friend, starting your own fashion line despite the odds of no connections, money or business background?

Are we practicing our own belief in impossible things? Or are we practicing the opposite—settling for unbelief because we cannot shut our eyes and believe for the impossible.

I want to encourage us to live from the place of impossibility. It is from this place we put into practice our trust and reliance on God. It's here where we "believe the Lord" and He finds us righteous. So...try again: draw and long breathe and shut your eyes...and believe.

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For further reading on believing Jesus, check out Nicodemus in John 3. Jesus tells Nicodemus about how the wind comes and goes, but we don't know how or from where. Nicodemus says "Really?" and Jesus responds "If you don't believe me when I tell you of earthly things, how you will believe me when I tell you of spiritual things?" An amazing insight that changes how we forever read John 3:16 because "the whosever believes in Him should not perish" actually has nothing to do with "believing in Jesus" like He's just some historical figured in a history book (similar to believing "in 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue"), but belief in Jesus comes from a present-tense reality of the Spirit of the Living God here and now—in essence, "Do you trust me right here and now?". Do we trust Jesus, in this present-tense moment, with the impossible? Do we trust Jesus enough to believe for the impossible? Are my eyes fixed on the unseen and not on what is seen, because what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal (2 Corinthians 4:18)? Good questions to ask ourselves.